because it's wednesday...

1.  I went out of my way to purchase reusable ice packs, but somehow they are all lost, and now i am back to using a bag of corn.  I really thought i had made it for a minute there.  This is knocking me down a peg.

At least its the green giant steamers bag of corn, and not the Aldi's bag of generic peas.  Because i dream big!


FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS


2. Either Matt is too lazy cannot figure out how to slice banana bread, or we have an infestation of gigantic banana bread eating mice.

Seriously, figure it out.  This is why we don't have nice things.


FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS


3.  backne.  No image necessary.


SARA SPECIFIC FIRST WORLD PROBLEM!!


4.  People are super pissed that "common folk" android users like myself now have access to the instagram app, and i-phoner's are no longer the elite.  And to throw salt in the wounds, facebook just bought instagram, so its even MORE mainstream now.  It must be so hard for you to deal with the fact that you now have the same stupid photo filter app that everyone else has.  I cry for you.

And just to throw acid on the salt that is festering in your wounds right now, here is an artsy picture i took of a bowl of pickles.  BECAUSE I CAN.

FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS.


5. I am seriously obsessed with texts from hillary.  I really want to text her an artsy picture i take with instagram.  I bet she would be super impressed.

FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS


6.  I put Matt in charge of groceries to keep him entertained during his funemployment, and he came back with these eggs:

I'm sorry, Dutch Farms eggs, but i am pretty sure that you do not, in fact, come from a Dutch farm.  In fact, i don't know what concerns me more - the fact that you would think people would want an egg that has actually travelled across the Atlantic ocean, or the fact that people will support you referring to your farm as being Dutch, when it is most likely in central Indiana.

You can't fool me, Dutch Farms.  These eggs are not even acceptable for throwing at people, because i demand farm fresh eggs.


FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS


7. I found out that you can buy a personal submarine for only $2 million dollars.  

I was really sad, until i found this other personal submarine that is a BARGAIN at just $100,000!!  And, its shaped like a killer whale!!!

I should be able to just put that baby on a credit card, right??  I mean, this is America....


FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS.


8. Sometimes it's hard to look so fabulous all the time.

bobbi, me and kim

If only you knew how much effort i put into schlepping around in spandex with salt in my hair and no make up on, well, you would weep  for me my friends.


FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS


9. Have you ever been half naked in the bathroom of a red robin?  Because i have.  Twice. 

No, i do not have any shame at all.


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10. And finally, i have to stop myself every wednesday at 10, because this post could potentially go on FOREVER, i leave you with this guy:

Seriously, what has someone just texted you that is so important/interesting/mind-blowing that you would neglect to notice the GOD DAMN BEAR IN FRONT OF YOU????

Legit.


FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS.