Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Oh, is it Wednesday?


1. My marathon is in 25 days.  I am so scared i could cry.
FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS.

2.  Kara Gouchers 1 year old son has a blog chronicling her road to the Olympics in London.  Not only is a baby much funnier and more interesting that i am, it turns out that despite being just a baby, he is also faster than me.  And cuter than me.  Damn you, Goucher family, why are you so awesome!!  I tried to see if waffles would write a blog post for me, since she is technically my baby, but this is all i got-

kafgh,kl,k  h 0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000hflx xk. ,ggggggjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj .s dfghsdfgl dflgk sdflgh

She is an intense puppy.


Then i asked if Matt would be my Adam Goucher and blog on my behalf.  To which he said "your blog is lame."  I get no love here.  No love.

FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS.

3.  Everyone has warned me about "taper madness."  It makes sense, that when you prepare for something for months, that you tend to freak out a little in the few weeks before the big day.  Its the same thing with pregnancy jitters and bridezillas, and senioritis.  However, nobody ever warned me about "pre-taper madness" in which i am fully infected (My taper doesn't even start until next week!)  All i can think about is the race.  And because there are still 15 days before i can obsessively check the 10-day weather report, i have taken to obsessively checking the farmers almanac, and historic weather facts.  The weird thing is that information never changes.  I just keep looking at it.  Did you know that on May 20, 1983 it was 66 degrees? and on May 20, 1994 it was 84 degrees?  Now you do.  Somebody stop me.
FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS.

4.  I have been really sad lately that despite being a working professional with a masters degrees, I am living paycheck to paycheck.  I have a relatively low amount of student loans, especially compared to the national average, but it still sucks up all my extra money.  This just seems so wrong, that everyone finishes school, and then spends 15 years eating ramen and scrambling to pay rent.  WTF, America?  its been a main topic at a lot of Obama's recent speeches.  Did you know that him and Michele only paid off their student loans in the past seven years?? What does that mean for me???
i do not.
FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS.

5. Just gonna throw this out there - 
NOT A CAR!!!!  Do not go cruising down the street at 15mph thinking you are a going at a comparable speed to my automobile!  You are not Lance Armstrong!!! Also, you are not going too fast to stop at a stop sign.  SO STOP AT IT.

FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS.

6.  I have two pairs of the exact same shoe.  

The only difference is color.  For some reason, the silver pair hurts my ankle.  The pink pair never does.  WTF? I hate to complain, but there is an 8 year old in Malaysia that is obviously slacking right now.  Think of it like a video game kid - a fun video game where you make my shoes properly!  It'll all be alright. 
FIRST WORLD PROBLEM (although, really - this problem is totally the third worlds fault.)

7.  I heard on the news today that the amount of illegal immigrants from Mexico is actually decreasing.  That means people who came here are leaving, because the think it sucks here.  All i can think about is the South Park episode where butters ends up illegally immigrating to Mexico, and becomes a god.
The times, they are a changin.
Also, i obviously have a very poor understanding of current events.

FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS.

8. My hands still smell like shallots from Sunday's cooking class!  HOW???
FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS.

9.  What do i even say about this 40lb cat.  How does a cat even get to be 40lbs???  And why does everyone always go after the owner?  Obviously the cat was overfed, but if he doesn't have the self control to stop eating the food when he is full, then that is a personal problem. Lets stop pointing fingers.  Get it together, Meow!  Only you can change this. 
And for that matter, if you chose to be this way, thats fine.  Don't conform to the pressures of society to be thin.  You do whatever you want.  Because you're a cat.  And your name is Meow.  And because you are now more famous than any of us will ever be.
FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS.

10.  Am i the only one who finds this offensive??
You can't just add bell peppers to corn and call it "Mexicorn"  that is so politically incorrect!  I don't know how companies sneak this stuff into our cabinets.  Its like if you put bamboo shoots in with the corn, you could call it "China-corn."  I don't know why i was offended by this.  Maybe its just the idea of canned corn in general that offends me.  Frozen is so much better.  I'm just gonna stop now.

FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS.

34 comments:

  1. You had me at League of Their Own. One of my favorite movies of all time, especially the Marla scenes. I love her and her love!

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    1. true story - my marathon in a few weeks will run past the old rockford peaches stadium :)

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  2. Your post just brightened my morning. :-)

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  3. The worst are when bike people don't follow traffic signs. I'm walking across an intersection where cars are stopped at a stop sign, but bike people NEVER stop. It's like... don't yell at me when you're the one being the a-hole! FWP fo sho.

    When I was buying my trail shoes, I had the same problem and something sharp was sticking in the back. I tried on another pair and didn't have that problem. WEIRDDDD....

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    1. Thats the worst part about buying shoes online (FWP.)

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  4. You probably just got that 8-yr old Malaysian girl executed. Just saying.
    NYCM announcement live at 11:30 am today! Squeee!

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    1. Gingerfoxxx, scourge of the third world!

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  5. I'll be honest... I HATE stopping at stop signs on my bike. HATE it. But I only run them if it's a 4 way stop and I can tell there aren't any cars coming. Yeah, I'm one of those cyclists.

    Are you on the income-contingent repayment plan for student loans? Do they still have that as an option? I swear that was an option when I finished graduate school.

    Also, Mexicorn? WTF?

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    1. They do still have the income-contingent option, i just want to get them paid off sooner rather than later :)

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  6. I'm so with you on the student debt stuff. That's why my husband and I are living with my parents right now. If we didn't have student loan debt eating all of our income, we theoretically could be living in a $300K house. (According to online affordable home calculators.)

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    1. ugghhh, if i could stand living with my mom (which i couldn't) I would so be there. I could get everything paid off in two years i bet!

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  7. Student loans make me puke in my mouth a little. Totally lame.

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  8. I am student loan free but still broke thanks to the housing market crash, the price increase of living that doesn't translate to our paychecks, 2 kids, 3 dogs, a cat & a wicked addition to running/racing/triathlon. Oh yeah, and I'm married.

    Good luck on the marathon. I know training takes FOREVER, it's okay to be obsessed. You are going to do great!

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    1. I couldn't even imagine trying to squeeze kids into the budget right now! We'd have to go on welfare!

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  9. Smartest one year old ever. hahaha that is awesome

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  10. I am stealing a couple of your pics from your page :-) If you rub a cut lemon over your hands won't that get rid of the lemon smell? I wouldn't take my advice until you googled it though. :-)

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    1. Steal away! I tried the lemon and it did help actually :)

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  11. My husband pays my student loans from our joint account (which I put all the money in to btw) so I have no idea what I pay. And I don't want to know. How sad is that? Actually, I don't even feel like I get a paycheck sometimes - most of it goes to our joint account! I do have a bit of spending $ but I am not traveling the world!

    I have a really hard time with bikes that ride in the street and don't want to follow street signs. Or bikes that ride on sidewalks and don't walk their bikes through intersections. It's so dangerous!

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    1. I just get so angry because i don't want to end up hitting them with my car! They just make it hard not to!

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  12. Bikers drive me CRAZY! Seriously, if I wasn't such a baby, I would scream at them every single time.

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    1. Oh i do scream at those hooligans. Its like i am a 70 year old trapped in a 28 year old body.

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  13. Love the blog ! You crack me up. You'll do fine on your marathon. Keep training hard!

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    1. Thanks, i'm here all week! Every week!

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  14. Meow this was quite the hilarious post. I think it's almost time for me to do a FWP post too. You have a good day, meow.

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    1. YES! Thank you for being the first and only person to make a Super Troopers reference!

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  15. I love the FWP :) I always come to visit and want to comment on everything but by the time I'm done reading I forget everything - but the fat cat is so cute :)

    PS: I've actually passed bikers - swerved in front of them and stopped - got out and yelled.

    I used to live on a hilly country road where they'd ride in packs! ummmm I can't pass you on a hill F****'s!

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    1. Luckily we have less packs in the city. Our cyclists tend to me misunderstood loners that are mysterious and aloof.... :D

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  16. I think your Wednesday posts are my all-time favorite posts to read in the entire blogworld. Always laugh. I also stole your "first world" problems idea for my post tomorrow. I plan to give you credit though, so it's only a partial steal.

    Tapering is miserable and awful and I totally feel your pain. Hopefully you'll be better at it then I was. I did poorly.

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    1. I think i should make it a mission to see how far the FWP can make it through the blogosphere! I always love other peoples way more than my own :D

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  17. Omfg that comment about the girl in Malaysia slacking had me dying! In all seriousness though that is wild your shoes feel different. Also that fat cat, is amazingly funny. Sad..terribly sad..but funny.

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    1. I really want there to be a tv special about Meow and his weight loss journey!

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