Wednesday, May 2, 2012

FWP - personal failures edition!

1. Driving safely to work.  I was attacked by a moth on Monday morning during my commute.  Rather than calmly and rationally opening a window and patiently waiting for him to exit of his own accord, i started screaming, swerving, and (unsuccessfully) trying to photograph it for the blog.
FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS.

2.  Guarding my belongings.  I was the last person to leave work Friday, and i left a six pack of soda in the very back corner of my desk area (not easily accessible)  I drank one at work on Friday, but when i came into work Monday morning, i discovered this:
SERIOUSLY???? Where is the 5th can? Who just goes into someone's space and takes there food items??? I feel so violated!  What kind of world do we live in where someone just takes a soda from someone's desk like its some kind of COMMUNAL SODA??  WE ARE NOT COMMUNISTS, buy your own soda!!!

FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS

3.  Teaching. In response to a previous post, i finally taught Matt how to use a can opener.  He was in no way grateful, and actually criticized the can opener as an inferior tool.  This coming from the guy opening cans with an oyster shucker.  See if i mentor people in the future.

FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS

4. Basic administrative functions.  My phone has been blinking for over a week now because i have a voicemail.  I have no idea how to check it.  I have been at my job for two years.  There is no way i can ask IT for help with this at this point.  I don't what makes me more sad - the fact that i can't use the voicemail, or the fact that this is my first voicemail.  In two years.
FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS.

5. Banking.  I went to the drive through bank because i get sick of them trying to get me to sign up for crap everytime i go inside.  And i vaguely remember always getting candy from the drive through bank as a child.  I pulled up, and ended up sitting there for 10 minutes.  Waiting for them to help me, or give me candy, or SOMETHING.  It turns out you have to push a call button to initiate the transaction.  So i sat there like an asshole for 10 minutes.  I was so blinded by my candy anticipation that i never thought about the logistics.  Also, i didn't get candy.  FML.
FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS

6.  Puppy parenting.  Waffles has her first test on friday for puppy class, and she is supposed to be able to sit.  I can tell you right now - she doesn't sit.  I even tried forcing her butt into the sit position, and she just flops onto her back.
Not. Even. Close.
FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS.

7. Choosing races that won't kill me.  I have been so obsessed with weather reports for the day of the marathon that i completely forgot to check the weather for the half marathon i am running this weekend in Cincinnati.
ARE YOU KIDDING ME OHIO???
FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS.

8. Tapering.  This sucks, and i don't know what to do with myself.
FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS.

9.  GPS skills.  My Garmin is stuck on Kilometers, and i can't get it to change back.  It is seriously messing with my head.  I do not understand the metric system at all, and i can't tell if i am running really fast or really slow.  
I've given up at this point and accepted that i either need to buy a new watch, or embrace the metric system.  
FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS, EH.

10. Social Networking.  As you saw, my twitter account got hacked.  I feel violated.  I got it from another girls twitter, but i am angry, because i didn't open anything, or click on any links.  I rarely even use twitter.  I mostly have it so that no one else can have my moniker.  (I'm selfish like that)  So who was screwing around with my twitter???  Then i noticed this picture i took of Matt this weekend.
BUSTED.   Never trust a puppy.

FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS

35 comments:

  1. hahahhaa - Waffles on the computer and Canada would gladly accept you ;)

    I can't believe someone would steal your soda (I call it pop) lol

    and Oh! I learned this puppy sit trick - if you have them on a leash you just pull up and hold. it forces them into a sit. You can also hold a treat in front of their far and then slowly move it over their head towards their back - they'll sit

    lol good luck!

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    1. Sweet! I am going to try the leash thing! we have been doing the food over her trick, but something with her breed makes it very awkward to sit (like a greyhound)

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  2. Thank YOU for giving me the virus! I think it's gone finally, knock on wood!

    People used to steal food from me all the time at my last job. I would get SO angry. THAT'S MY FOOD!

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    1. Ohhh noooooo! I can't believe it got you too! :( I'm sorry, i really don't know why people even let me have twitter. Also, i am going to get a label maker and start labeling my food, if you want in on that action.

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    2. crap how do you know if someone hacked your account?? I mean I am sure there isn't some email that comes in "Hey you know what, your account has been hacked..(evil laugh)"

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  3. Hahahaha love the picture of your dog "sitting".

    I was wondering about that strange Twitter message you sent me, I hope I didn't send crap out to people. But oh yeah, I don't really have anyone but Kelsey and you who talk to me on Twitter so no one could tell me if it did happen to me...

    I love not being popular.

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    1. you have no idea how many people called me sunday afternoon to ask me why "i was saying bad things about them on twitter." Ugh. i hate technology.

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  4. Haha, I love all of these. I've totally done that at the bank before when I first got my car and actually went to a drive through (like 3 years ago). I think they only give you candy if there are kids in the car (dumb rule), although they do always give me a dog treat if she's with me. They are treats that she would snub at home, but if it is free from the bank she wants it (naturally).

    I think that there seems to be heat where and when you plan your half marathons. What's up with that?! Hopefully it will be better than Get Lucky and at least less dangerous (dang those bikers!)

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    1. I'm concerned that no one will ever want to do a race with me because i am the bringer of heat. It's the red hair, i just know it!

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    2. you know, i was just thinking ... ALL the rest of my races I've signed up for this year you are running too and will therefore be 100 degrees :(

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    3. yeah, you are basically doomed at this point.

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  5. seriously though - who leaves voicemails anymore? email or text people.

    yikes sorry about this weekend :( run slow and for fun (or at least try!) and then we can kill it together at the women's half! or 13.1 or Rock n Roll. we have plenty to choose from, it can't be 88 degrees at them all? or maybe it can. maybe i shouldn't sign up for the same races as you......

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    1. At least one of them has to be windy/rainy. (according to my track record.)

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  6. Yeah I think food and beverage stealing runs rampant in the workplace. A friend of mine had her urine sample stolen out of the office fridge. Perfect.

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    1. No freaking way!! why would anyone want PEE??

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    2. Isn't the better question why someone is keeping pee in the office fridge in the first place?!

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  7. Sorry about the yucky weather for the weekend. Saturday it said for Boise a week ago it was going to be 90 on Saturday. Now, thankfully the forecasted high is 60. Silly weather.

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    1. Luckily, i signed up for a MILLION races this year, so here's hoping at least one is a reasonable temperature!

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  8. Hysterical, as usual. Thanks for the giggles. And please set up a twitter account for me cuz I'm too lazy or busy or just scared that social media will eventually take over my life.

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    1. OMG, if i set up a twitter account for you, it would probably just send out spam messages to everyone!

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  9. Haha we just got those same phones at my office! Unfortunately, I missed the phone training, and can't help you. Also, I have 2 VMs that I have yet to figure out how to check.

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    1. The way i see it, if its really important, they'll call back :)

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  10. Yea...this was pretty funny...I found you from a comment you made on "Losing Lindy"...say, what site do you use to write comments on pictures like that?

    Very cute..

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    1. Luckily i work in design, so i am a whiz in photoshop! I think you can use MS paint as well, and i have even seen some smart phone apps!

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    2. KJ is pretty cool..and I LOVE that she found your awesomeness from my blog! I am now dancing around here like I won something. yeah I know..I need a date, or to go to bed. I get way too excited about things like this ;)

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  11. I don't mean to ask the obvious question but can't you just push the little envelope button on your phone to get your voicemail?

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    1. This would in theory make sense, but there is some kind of code you need to enter that i do not have!

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  12. DailyKilometer! Nice. Tell your dog thanks for the spam. Also one of my Twitter accounts used to send spammy messages constantly! And it was my "professional" one too. I changed the password on the account and I think that fixed it. Of course, it took me months before I thought to do that.

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    1. Luckily i had a friend text me as soon as it went out and told me to change my password. I still feel like an idiot thought!

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  13. OK I totally understand people taking your stuff in the office. I had a refrigerator in my old office. Now I am going to be in a cube, with no space for me, let alone a frig.

    So I am back..how do I get some of those fab pink laces... :)

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    1. We should try and organize a run next weekend!! or are you doing 13.1??

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  14. btw..have you tried pushing the button that has the envelope picture for your voice mail? My guess is that you initially set it up, and that is how to access it. If you don't remember your password, because you are always at your desk to answer the calls, I say it is a good first world problem. :)

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    1. I tried that! I just ended up putting a post it note over the blinking light so i don't have to look at it anymore.

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  15. OMG, loved this...you are awesome girl.

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  16. arg my twitter was hacked too and i never open anything! feels violating. and kilometers suck but I'm getting the hang a little. everytime you finish a run if you divide the kilometers run by 1.6 you get nearly the exact amount of miles run, give or take a tenth or two.

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